"My grace truly is enough..."

The room was quiet, empty. She was alone as she thought about everything that had aspired. As the shame and guilt began to wash over her, she dropped her head and began to speak...

"God, I dont know what to do. I have tried so many times to change this behavior....I feel like no matter how hard I try, I can't break this habit. I know I need to change. Everytime I fail. I try so hard, but I fail so often. When will you step down and help me? When will I get a grip on this problem? I know that I am hurting myself and the ones I love, but I can't stop. It's not healthy for me to act this way. I know your grace is enough, but how many times will I mess up before you stop loving me? How many times will I fail before you retract your grace? How many times do I need to fail before I get it right? I am such a failure. I wish I could get it right. Everytime I mess up, I tell you I wont do it again. Before I know it, I am back here again. I need something to change. This is no way to live. The secret I bear is fearfully large. I can't share it with anyone. The lonliness, the isolation is unbearable at times. I know I could change this, do I just not want it bad enough? Do I just need to give up? Stop trying? How can I change when I know I will fail again? This pattern has been too much to bear. I don't deserve to be forgiven again by you. I don't deserve to be shown grace and mercy. How much grace can one God have? How many times can I fail before you cut me off from your grace? How many times can I fail and be redeemed? I try so hard. I just dont know if I can do this anymore. The battle is becoming too difficult to fight. I have needed you, but I have not found you. Will you show me how to do the right thing? I know I can't have that many chances left. Especially since I have been forgiven already, so many times. I know all I have to do is ask for your grace, and mercy. I know I just need to ask you to forgive me, but how can I do that when I know I will fail again. That would mean I am not really, truly sorry. That would mean my repentance is not true, because they said in church that repentance, is turning around and running the other direction. I dont think I can do this anymore. God, are you listening? Are you there? Can you help me? Am I just beyond help?"

She sat there with her head down, out of breath from the words she spoke. He replied...

"My dear, precious child. I have always loved you. I always will. I said in my word to you forgive not once, but 7X70 times. My grace is truly enough for you. Thats why its called grace. You can't earn it, you can't buy it. I give it freely because I love you. I will forgive you more times than you can count. I love you, this is why I gave my life for you. It does hurt me to see you this way. I want to see your heart broken for what breaks mine. Your heart, I gave you a tender heart. I have forgiven you everytime you asked. You're right, all you have to do is ask. Every time it will get easier, I am right by your side. I will never leave you. It doesn't matter to me how many times you fail. Just keep trying. I know the road you have walked, I know the pain you have felt, I know the temptation you have endured. This life is not everything I had intended for you. I have so much more for you. I am just waiting patiently for you to have the desire to have it. I am here. I fight for you when you cannot fight. I carry you when you cannot walk. I watch over you when you cannot keep watch yourself. Never do I sleep, never do I break from your side. You are my beautiful creation, my beautiful daughter. I love you, and I hope that you know my grace truly is enough."