Late night ride... c/1

KNOCK! KNOCK! KNOCK!

She set down her book, walked quietly over to the door. She turned the deadbolt and it clicked into the unlocked position. She turned the knob and slowly, gently, and quitely opened the door. Her heart skipped a beat when she saw his face. He was standing there, so cool and collected. His jet black hair, spiked on his head, his dark grey tee, with stylish jeans, leather jacket, and a helmet snug up under his arm.
"Hey." He said, in a quiet gentle tone with a sly smile on his face.
"Hey." She returned with a smirk on her face and in her voice.

They had known eachother for some time now, he worked in a different department, but he smiled at her everytime he was in her area, or she was in his, and every time, her heart skipped a beat. Her face felt hot as if to say 'I'm bright red! Look at me!' It always embarrassed her, she wished her face wouldnt be so obnoxiously rebellious in its color. She couldnt help it though, she knew that there was more between them than a casual 'hi', or 'how are you today' every so often. She was ready to find out about this mystery guy. What was he all about, anyway?

He was nervous. His stomache in a knot, 'what if she doesnt like me after tonight' he thought to himself. He always tried to find reasons to go into her department at work, just so he could say hi. She was so beautiful! He swallowed back the nervous lump in his throat, took off his helmet and put down the kick stand on his BMW sports bike he loved that bike. He had been riding since he was 6 years old, and had finally gotten his dream bike only months prior, but he already knew how to handle it. As he stood and swung his leg over the seat to stand, he felt almost weak in the knees. This girl did that to him, and he loved it. As he moved slowly up the stairs to her apartment, he replayed their conversation from earlier in his mind. Him asking if she would like to go out for a late night ride, her smile in agreement, he was thrilled. He approached her door, and gave it a knock. He waited, and then heard the click of the door unlock, as she opened it from the other side, he saw her standing there, with a smirk on her face. She was not just beautiful, she was gorgeous! Her long wavy blonde hair fell perfectly into place, her deep blue eyes, and amazing smile, and oh her freckles! They drove him crazy. She was perfect in her looks, and her personality, she was sweet. He greeted her
"Hey." He could feel a sly smile creeping on his face.
"Hey." She said with a smirk, on her beautiful face.

She invited him inside, as she thought to herself 'he is actually here! He really came...' She figured he would come in, they would chat, then go on this late night ride he had promised her...of course it was already 10 P.M. She really wasnt sure what direction she should go with the timeframe, but she didnt care. It was friday night, she could sleep in the morning. All that mattered at that moment is him being there with her, thats all she cared about. Nothing else mattered, not even if they actually went for that ride or not. What he did next suprised her some. He got this look in his eye, a twinkle, that said 'I have something wonderful planned.' Next he grabbed her hand and gently pulled her out the door, it closed behind her, then he led her down the stairs, to his bike. She smiled as he handed her a helmet and helped her put it on, then gently tighten the strap. She liked the way he was so gentle with her, it was almost like he thought he would break her, she liked it. He said to her the words she would remember for the rest of her life...
"Are you ready ride with me?" She nodded and climbed on behind him, she liked the feel of his back to her front as she wrapped her arms around him to hold tight. He felt strong, and she felt safe probably for the first time in her life. Before he backed out of the parking space, she looked up at the sky, stars were everywhere! Like someone had sprinkled glitter in the dark, night sky. It was a beautiful moment in time. In a moment they were off.

He stood there looking her over for a minute, when she invited him in for a moment. He hesitated in her beauty, then went for it. He gently snatched up her hand, being careful not to be too rough. He wanted her to like him afterall, what girl would like a guy who was rough? Probably not a single one. He led her quickly but gently down the stairs and looked back to see her door close behind her, and her long blonde hair flowing. No matter how hard he tried, he could not get over her beauty. He led her to his bike, and handed her the helmet he had bought earlier that day, just for her to use. This would be the first time he had taken a passenger on his bike, and this one, oh such precious cargo she is. He wanted to make sure she would be safe and protected, so he bought the best helmet he could find. He helped her put it on, as he did his hand brushed over her hair, it was so soft and smoothe. As he tightened the helmet strap for her, the back of his hand came to her jawline, her skin was so flawless. She seemed perfect in every way. Once he was sure her helmet was on correctly, and she would be safe he looked her in the eye and said
"Are you ready to ride with me?" He watched as she smiled, nodded and climbed on behind him. She wrapped her delicate arms around him, he liked the feel of her against him. He had to make sure he drove extra careful tonight, he didnt want to do anything wrong, anything stupid, with such a priceless girl with him. With a sigh of hope, he backed out of the parking space and they were off.

As they rode through the dark of night, she felt so special. She loved the way their bodies seemed to move as one. The way they leaned together. She knew if she just followed his lead she would be okay. She wasnt sure where they were going exactly, but she didnt care. He was in charge, and she was happy to be there with him.

He had the perfect spot picked out. He had been there a few times before, but only by himself to think or pray after the initial time, when his sister showed him the spot. Never had he taken anyone to his secret spot, he didnt think it would be right, but now, with her, it seemed ok. He wanted to take her there, he wanted the night to be special, one she would never forget. He didnt want to mess this up! Afterall, she had already said yes. He just wanted to show her the best time he could. Every turn, he was careful. He had to be careful! He wouldnt mind crashing if it were just himself, but with her on behind, he couldnt, wouldnt crash this bike! He felt her snuggle in a little closer, and wrap her arms a little tighter, he liked that. He liked feeling her take his lead in which way to lean. Feeling their bodies move as one, was a great feeling. As they arrived at his secret lookout destination, he pulled up carefully. Parked, gently put the kickstand down and clicked off the engine. He felt her release her grip on him, and step off the bike. He followed behind her. They both removed their helmets, he thought he would take a chance once again, he gently reached for her soft hand and led her to the edge of the lookout, they sat on the bench there. She looked out, but he had seen it before, his eyes were on her. He watched her take a deep breath, and exhale, as if she were in a deep moment of thought. She turned to him.
"This is so beautiful. How did you find it?" She said in a quiet voice.
"My sister brought me here once, before she passed away. I come here to think and pray." He usually didnt want to talk about his sister, but he felt comfortable sharing with her. He wanted her to know everything, but he certainly didnt want to scare her away. So he stuck with small talk at first.
"Oh, I am so sorry about your sister. I didnt know-"
"Thats okay, I have processed a lot. She is in heaven now."
"I have a son in heaven, lost him before he was born. Maybe they know eachother." He was suprised at her openess, but welcomed it. He wanted to know everything about her. He was sad for her son though. He couldnt imagine how hard that must be to lose a child.
"I'm sorry about that. I cant imagine what thats like" He replied as he looked into her eyes. Deep blue and beautiful, he could see the pain inside her though. It was clear she was deeply hurt by the loss of her unborn child.
"Its okay, it wasnt part of Gods plan for me to have my son. Besides that, he will never know the hurt of this world, which really is the ultimate gift for him, and the prayer of every mother. That their children will know no pain or suffering. My child is blessed...."

As he listened to her talk he responded, they jumped from topic to topic, slowly discussing their lives. Seconds turned to minutes, and minutes turned to hours. He didnt pay attention to the time. They were conversing intently with eachother, learning the details of eachothers lives.

She didnt want to let go when he slowed to a stop and clicked off the engine. She held on just a moment longer, hoping he wouldn't think she was weird for holding him close a second longer. She loosed her grip on him, and dismounted the bike. She loved riding with him. She watched him step off, and remove his helmet. She did the same. He then gently took hold of her hand, and butterflies hit her stomach! He was holding her hand and that made her insides want to jump for joy, but she calmly followed his lead to the bench. As she sat down, she looked out over the city lights. They were beautiful! She took a deep breath, thinking of Gods magnificent creations, and the beauty of the simplicity of city lights. She exhaled and turned to him, the thought lingering in her mind.
"This is so beautiful. How did you find it?" She said in a quiet voice.
"My sister brought me here once, before she passed away. I come here to think and pray." She saw the pain in his eyes as he shared the words. She could see that he had loved his sister very much, and she could see the scar left on his heart. She felt bad for bringing it up, so she quickly apologized.
"Oh, I am so sorry about your sister. I didnt know-"
"Thats okay, I have processed a lot. She is in heaven now." As he quickly retorted, she thought of her own son in heaven, it was so hard losing him before she even had the chance to know him. If there was one thing she did know, it was the hurt and pain of losing someone. The tears that came with it, were sometimes unbearable.
"I have a son in heaven, lost him before he was born. Maybe they know eachother." She didnt know why she was telling him this, other than to let him know he was not alone in grief. She rarely brought up her son, it seemed to make people uncomfortable, but he seemed to understand. If there was one thing she had learned, it was that other people who were grieving the loss of a loved one were not afraid or uncomfortable in talking about their loved ones, or her son.
"I'm sorry about that. I cant imagine what thats like" His words were so gentle, and comforting. She appreciated his compassion. No judgement, just true compassion in his voice. Since she was not a married gal, people were often quick to pass judegement. He was different.
"Its okay, it wasnt part of Gods plan for me to have my son. Besides that, he will never know the hurt of this world, which really is the ultimate gift for him, and the prayer of every mother. That their children will know no pain or suffering. My child is blessed...."

They kept talking, moving from topic to topic. She learned about him, and she shared about herself. She enjoyed the time so much with him that she forgot about the time. He seemed to be intent on talking with her, and she was having such a great time, she didnt care that the seconds turned to minutes and the minutes turned to hours.... She felt a small chill run down her spine, it felt colder out than it had before. She looked out over the city, and realized the sky was lighter than it had been in the distance. Was the sun really rising already!? Did they really just stay out and talk all night? She didnt want to leave, she wanted to stay and talk with him for days! She knew that their time was coming to an end..

He caught her shiver, though it looked like she tried to hide it. He noticed the air seemed cool and crisp. It felt much colder than it had before. He watched her look out at the view, he looked out, if only to follow her lead. Was it getting light out? The sky seemed to be brighter from afar. He checked his watch, and sure enough! They had been there all night long, talking. He couldnt believe he let the time get away from him. He was thrilled that they had spent so much time together, but he knew she must be ready for bed. How rude of himself to keep her out all night! He thought, maybe he should get her home. He looked at her again, taking in the beauty of her face and long blonde hair as if it would be the last time he would see her. He knew he needed to stop stalling, how irresponsible of him. What would she think of him now, keeping her out. He only hoped she had good enough time to want to see him again.
"Well, shall we get you home?" He asked in a sheepish, and almost embarrassed tone.
"I suppose that might be appropriate." She replied with a gentle smile on her face.

She hoped he wouldnt catch her shiver, so she adjusted in an attempt to disguise it. He looked out at the sky, she looked back at him. She caught him glancing at his watch, she knew that their time was ending. Looking at the watch was always a sure sign. She was tired, but she had such a wonderful time. He looked tired though, she looked into his deep brown eyes. For a moment she looked straight into his soul, at that moment, she knew beyond a shadown of a doubt that he was a good guy. He looked almost as if he were ashamed.
"Well, shall we get you home?" He asked. She wanted to say no! She didnt want their time to end. She wanted to ask him to put his arm around her and stay a little longer. She also wanted to be respectful of his time.
"I suppose that might be appropriate." Was her answer, in hopes that he would change his mind and watch the sunrise with her. Instead he stood and held out his hand, she smiled, placed her hand in his. He felt so stong, yet so gentle. She felt so secure when her hand was in his. She stood, and they walked back to the bike together. They put on their helmets, and climbed on the bike. He started the engine, and she wrapped her arms around him, afterall, she had to hold on so she wouldnt fall off, right? She tightened her grip just a little when he eased on the throttle, and they pulled away from this beautiful spot.

He really wished she would have asked to stay and watch the sunset, but he felt as though he had already kept her out late enough. With her answer, he pushed to his feet, and held his hand hoping she would take it. She slid her hand in his as she lifted herself to stand. He let her take the lead back to the bike, watching her blonde hair. He was enthralled with her beauty. He climbed on the bike, after they both secured their helmets. She clibmbed on after. As he started the engine he felt her arms slide around his waist, he liked that feeling. He gently pulled the throttle back and rode away from the lookout. The drive back to her apartment seemed to be too quick! He wanted her to stay just a little longer, holding tight to him. As he pulled into the same parking space as before, he wished the night were not over. The sun was now in the sky and casting shadows all around. The air was clean and fresh. He left the engine on for just a few seconds, hoping she would not release her grip. Then he clicked it off, they both stepped off the bike.
"Let me walk you to your door." He asked in a statemtent fasion.
"Thank you." She replied as she handed him the helmet that had protected her beautiful head. He followed her up the stairs. She unlocked the door then turned around to face him, his heart skipped.
"Thank you, for the evening. I had a wonderful time." She said with a grin on her soft lips.
"You...are very welcome! I hope to see you again soon." He meant the words with all his heart, and hoped she wasnt just being polite by thanking him.
"I hope so too. Goodnight." She said as she backed slowly in the door and closed it behind her.

As he pulled into the parking space, she thought to herself, 'where did the time go? The drive back didnt take long enough!' She hoped that he would change his mind, back out and take her somewhere else. Just as long as she could stay in his presence, she would be happy. She felt him click off the engine. She stepped off, and he followed.
"Let me walk you to your door." He requested. She was appreciative, most of the guys she had dated in the past would have dropped her at the curb and taken off. She was greatful for his consideration.
"Thank you." She replied as she placed the helmet in his hands. He followed her up the stairs, she felt him watching her as they walked, not in a bad way, in a protective way that made her feel safe. As she unlocked the door she prayed the night wouldnt end yet, but she knew it was. She turned to face him, the butterflies in her stomache returned as she peered into his deep brown eyes.
"Thank you, for the evening. I had a wonderful time." She hoped her sincerity would come across, as she gave a polite smile.
"You...are very welcome! I hope to see you again soon." He replied, She hoped he was being sincere in his words hoping to see her again. She really wanted to press up against him, wrap her arms around him and beg him not to go, but she refrained. Hoping her disappointment wouldnt show.
"I hope so too. Goodnight." She said as she backed slowly in the door and closed it behind her. She turned the lock and it clicked into place. She turned around, and closed her eyes. Soaking in the last few hours she had spent with this amazing man. She thought of the safety she felt with him as she rode along behind him, her life in his hands. Somehow, she realized that she trusted him fully with her life. There was just something about him that made her feel safe. Perhapse the gentle strength that he posessed. As she thought more about it, she realized that the late night ride, was similar to the life walk with Jesus. She realized that if she put total control of her life in Jesus' hands, and cling to him, He would take care of her. She thought about how if she had let go, even for a second, she would fall off the back, and the bike would probably crash, hurting them both. A lot like the life walk. We let go of Jesus for even a split second, and we can crash and burn... She thought it interesting the comparison between this late night ride, and her walk with Jesus. She opened her eyes, looked around, closed them again and whispered
"Thank you Jesus for always protecting me, and please Lord, let me see him again."

He stood there a moment after she closed the door. He heard the click of the deadbolt being locked into place. He turned and slowly walked back down the steps to his bike, he prayed she would run back out and ask him to stay. He approached his bike, stepped over, put his helmet on and sat for a moment in the silence. The whole world seemed to be asleep aside from him and her. Probably just him now, as she probably went straight to bed. He thought to himself how much he would love to see her again, and just how much he had enjoyed their late night ride. He started up the engine, backed out, and pulled back the throttle. He slowly drove out of the complex, and headed toward home. Hoping, praying, he would see her again soon and thanking Jesus for their late night ride.

The God who wasnt there

So, I was in the library today using the internet and printing off some copies, then to look for a few good movies to check out. I came across this one titled "The God who wasnt there" by Brian Flemming. Basically a documentary trying to "prove" God doesnt exist. In the end of the movie, he even denies the Holy Spirit. Well, I feel sorry for this guy, when God comes back and Brian is thrown into the pit of hell, and realizes the terrible mistake he has made... Right now, I intend to break down his 62 minute film about why God doesnt exist and simply give my opinion. If youre against opinions (right or wrong) you can stop reading and exit my blog :) I am not going to break down the documentary in great detail, just look at some of the "big" arguments he gives. This is not an attempt to argue or offend, I was intrigued by this documentary and thought I would give my opinion on it...afterall, I am one oppinionated s.o.b :) anyway, in addition, I am no expert on christianity, or any of this stuff. I live by my own experiences with God. I will say this, Brian Flemming is trying to convince people that God doesnt exist, he failed. If anything, this documentary inspired me to do more research later on and strengthened my faith.

His main argument, there is no proof of God existing. Well, my dear friend, that is why its called faith.

Google defines faith : faith/fāTH/Noun

1. Complete trust or confidence in someone or something.

2. Strong belief in God or in the doctrines of a religion, based on spiritual apprehension rather than proof. 

 

Ok, ok...lets go ahead and get into the depths of this guys documentary...

 

His argument-First he starts off by saying that the earth didnt always revolve around the sun, that the sun revolved around the earth for hundreds of years, that christianity was wrong about the solar system, so maybe theyre wrong about other stuff...

 

My opinion-To that I would say this. I am no expert on the solar system, so I am not going to dispute that. I will say I am curious as to where he got his "facts" from. I have always been taught that the earth revolved around the sun, in public school... So, if thats what he is basing this whole thing off of...idk.

 

His argument- In the documentary he interviewed several christians coming out of a church service. He asked them about the life of Jesus. They all seemed happy to share, which is great. He says that the people's faces are all happy when theyre talking about Jesus. Then he says there are other faces of christianity. I.E. Charles Manson who claimed to be Jesus Christ and inspired his followers to kill 11 people.

 

My opinion- Of course we are happy to share about Jesus, after He gave his life for me, and saved me from death... I am more than happy, I am joyful to share my experiences and what I believe about Jesus. Charles Manson was not Jesus, he was crazy, possibly demon posessed. Who knows what was going through his mind and body when he did that.

 

His argument- He states in the documentary that the bible started as a fictional story and was transformed by people to become truth.

 

My opinion- Ever heard of the game telephone? Whisper a secret into someone's ear, then they whisper to someone else, by the time it gets to the end of the circle, the origional word and the end word are shared aloud.. they are usually two totally different things. Lets think about this though. He talked about some of the fictional stories on the internet that later became "based on a true story" type thing. Well, 99% of them are forgotten about as quickly as they come about. The bible, has survived over 2000 years, stating the same thing, the most popular book in the world... kind of puts it in perspective for me.

 

His argument- The passion of the Christ, by Mel Gibson is ONLY popular because it is bloody.

 

My opinion- The passion of the Christ, is so popular because it is the closest depiction of what really happened. It gives us a sense of the weight of how much Christ suffered to save us from our sins, and it puts it into perspective for us. It has nothing to do with blood.

 

His argument- Any religion that supports the de-humanization and mistreatment of homosexuals is wrong.

 

My opinion- I agree with him here, to an extent. I am not by any means saying I think its right to treat homosexual people wrong. I have many friends who are, and I at one point in my life made the choice to live that way as well. Here is my thought on it. The church, is stupid in this matter. IT IS NOT OUR JOB AS CHRISTIANS TO JUDGE, DE-HUMANIZE, OR MISTREAT HOMOSEXUALS, IT IS OUR JOB TO LOVE THEM FOR WHO THEY ARE!!! The choices they make are theirs to make. Just like we have the choice to love and follow Jesus. How would you like it if someone judged, de-humanized, or mistreated you just because you believe in God?? Guarentee'd answer, you wouldnt! So if you are a person who claims christianity, stop acting in this way! Their choices are between them and God, just the same as your choices are between you and God. Your job, is only to love people. All people, not just the ones who think the same way you do... Now, on the other hand, it does say in the bible that homosexuality is a sin, "You are not to sleep with a man as with a woman; it is detestable." - Leviticus 18:22.  Also in 1 Corintians 6:9 of the NIV, and this being taken from the website http://www.biblegateway.com/-

1 Corinthians 6:9

New International Version (NIV)

⁹ Or do you not know that wrongdoers will not inherit the kingdom of God? Do not be deceived: Neither the sexually immoral nor idolaters nor adulterers nor men who have sex with men^[a]

Footnotes:

1. 1 Corinthians 6:9 The words men who have sex with men translate two Greek words that refer to the passive and active participants in homosexual acts.

This is what the bible says. I agree with it, however, God still loves everyone! His heart is saddened by the actions of people, but that doesnt mean he still doesnt love them. I could go on for hours on this topic, but for my time and your times sake, lets move on.

 

His argument- There is no scientific evidence. It cannot be proven that Jesus is who he said he is.

 

My opinion- Thats why its called faith.

 

Lastly I leave you with a quote from the Doctor of a christian school, who was interviewed by Brian Flemming.

 

"The height of irresponisbility is to ignore the reality of God and to ignore the person of Jesus Christ" -Dr. Ronald Sipus

 

 

 

Discalimer: This is my opinion. I reccommend you check the data for yourself. The God who wasnt there can be checked out at the Multnomah County Library. In addition, check the bible. 

grattitude list

I am thankful for....

my family,
my house,
my cat,
the sunshine,
my bible,
my couch,
my phone,
blankets,
the sunshine,
my car,
paint,
flowers,
my teacups,
books,
my journal,
writing,
my fan,
shoes,
socks,
clothes,
medication,
ice,
cooking,
baking,
showers,
toilet paper..lol,
my job,
jewelry,
lotion,
makeup,
my tv,
light,
heat,
the rain,
sugar,
church,
candles,
soap....

And many more things. A simple list, things we take for granted everyday... I am truly thankful for all these things that make my life comfortable, convenient, and happy. When I am feeling down, I write a simple grattitude list like this one, to remember that I am blessed, I am happy, I am taken care of. God is good, and I know that no matter the crap I have been through in life, no matter the incredible amounts of pain I suffer from, I am truly blessed. Try it sometime :)